Our First Struggle: The First Night Home

        I was hospitalized for two days after the birth of Lily. We were discharged the afternoon of Friday, February 14^th. My fiance Terence, and I were so excited to take our little baby girl home. He was most excited about introducing her to our dog, Max. I was most excited about having my bed back. 

       Up until then we hadn't really ever been alone with her. We had a lot of visitors and my mom was at the hospital with us almost the entire time. Since I had delivered her so late and didn't get into my recovery room until close to midnight we decided to put her in the nursery while I got some sleep after being so tired for so long. Terence had gotten a little sleep, but not much. The worst part about having her in the nursery was them coming to wake me up to feed her every 2 hours. That was terrible because they would wake me up and then she wouldn't want to eat. I considered telling them to just give her formula instead of attempting to breastfeed. I didn't have them give her formula even though it was exhausting and very difficult, luckily the hospital had some great lactation consultants that were able to help us before we left. 

When we got home we were so excited. Max loved her! He checks on her when she cries and follows around whoever has her. He loves to sleep in his bed next to her cradle in our room or next to her crib. We did have to keep him from licking her though, he loves to try and lick her feet. 

     We figured we would be just fine having a few friends come over and watch a movie with us. We just assumed she would sleep just fine. Up until then all she really did was sleep. We watched a movie and ended up staying up til a little after midnight. Right as we crawled into bed she decided to wake up... and stay up. She started crying and screaming. We tried everything to get her to stop. We changed her diaper, fed her, burped her, and made sure she was nice and warm but nothing worked! 

She would calm down more when she was held and rocked so we took turns doing that, but as soon as you stopped the wailing would once again begin. We each got about 2 hours of sleep while the other dealt with the baby in another room. We were so exhausted and had no clue what to do. We wished we had accepted the offer of help from my Mother who said she could stay and help us that first night. (We plan to accept it when we have more children sometime in the distant future!) By the time we were finally able to put her down the sun had come up. We were exhausted and were glad to finally get some sleep. The first night was absolute hell. I wouldn't wish that experience on anyone. I have never been more exhausted or annoyed in my entire life!

  We learned a few valuable lessons that first dreadful night.  We learned to always accept help, no matter what. Even if you want to experience things on your own and think you can handle it, still accept it. You have to be strong enough to put your pride aside and ask for help when you need it. -We learned that you are never to old to need your Mother. Mine has been a lifesaver in the two weeks since Lily's birth. She's been there for advice, to listen to my fears, questions, and concerns and she's been a shoulder to cry on when things get too overwhelming. The birth of Lily taught me the importance of family and to surround yourself with good people, people who genuinely care. I can honestly I don't think I would have been able to make it through labor and delivery or the last weeks without her guidance and support. Even though I don't always agree with her advice it's still so great to have the other options and another viewpoint. 

           

           Things aren't always easy. Trying to balance having a family and focus on school while Terence works and attends classes is the hardest thing we have ever done. We've learned so much in such a short amount of time. I'm sure our little girl will keep teaching us new things everyday. Who knew you could learn so much from something so new, and so little.